Failure hurts.

It dampens our spirits and bruises our egos.

The thing about failure is that it is a crucial part of life. It’s necessary and just as important as success. If you’re like me then you’ve failed more than you can count. Small fails and epic failures. Do I like it? No, not at all. The presence of failure can teach us crucial life lessons that can help us for the better.

It’s one of my favorite teachers.

It teaches us compassion, empathy, patience, and kindness. The little chip at our ego that helps to make us into a better us.

What’s failure?

What is a failure and why is it important?

It’s often something thought of in a negative light. Something painful or upsetting. Failure, in life, can be bombing a test. It can be a meeting not going the way you wanted. It can be babies falling when walking.

I like the example of babies walking as failures. Much like babies and their wobbling undeveloped legs, we often take risks and land flat on our asses (or faces, if you were like me as a baby!)

However many of us still learned how to walk. We walk. We fall. We walk. We fall. So on and so on until we can confidently do so on our own. Some may never learn how to walk but they still manage to find a way.

It’s a part of life. Not everything is going to help us walk.

For example, I like to look at this semester of school. I’m currently enrolled in a forensic psychology course. Things are going relatively smoothly except for my journal assignments. It’s the first time I received a C in a while.

Did it hurt to find out that something wasn’t a hit or didn’t pan out the way I intended? Yes, but what did it teach me? The feedback that came with the C opened my eyes to some of the issues I had with the assignment.

The next journal left me with a B. Not a stellar grade for me but it’s an improvement (shout out to profs who let you do revisions for a new grade.)

The problem with failure is that

We are so used to celebrating successes that no one takes the time to talk about their failures. People post constantly about their perfect hobby results or career advancements so that we don’t see the setbacks behind them. The person who posted that perfect RG Sazabi may not talk about how they needed to strip a paint job because they got orange peel. The person who gets the job advancement doesn’t discuss how many review meetings have gone to shit.

Why it’s necessary

Failure teaches us life lessons that nothing else really can.

What we gain from failure is experience. First-hand experience of what didn’t work along with the knowledge that we may need to try something different. If you mess up masking a model part then you can try it differently the next time.

Failure also helps build resilience. The more failures we face, the more resilient we become.

I have failed many papers and failed many times when it comes to hobbies. Recently I messed up the FEP plate on my new 3D printer by a rookie mistake (while printing a rook, the irony). I learned what not to do and tried again with success. Will there be other printing failures? Sure, probably. You just get used to it and start rolling with the waves.

Or what I call personal development and growth. As we fail in life, we grow as people. We’re able to better understand and handle the emotions that come with it. This not only helps us handle it but also allows us the ability to better help others with their failures.

Recovering from fumble

First off to the people that said “told you so”, don’t. Most of the time it isn’t necessary and doesn’t add anything of value to the situation. Try to understand that it’s okay to fail. It’s okay. It happens. Pull yourself up and allow yourself to feel those emotions that come along. They’re valid. Then try again.

Sooner this will become an easier process to handle.

Failure isn’t the end all be all. No failure is truly a failure unless you toss the towel in. Don’t let it discourage you from attempting or perusing something that you want to do!

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Have a happy Tuesday, everyone!

-J