I would like to start off by saying that I had an oddly humorous but stupid dream last night where there was a hit Gundam dating sim that came out on Steam. Sold out world-wide. Won some gaming award of the year. Spin-offs, a hit manga series, and even a store in Times Square.

Now you would think it would be dating the pilots or characters like Bright Noa, Char, Cima Garahau, and so on. Typical dating sim.

Nope.

In this game you dated the mechs.

I do not know the logistics behind it, but you slowly build platonic and romantic relationships with these mechs by piloting them or through other activities. You would then get a certain ending determined by in-game choices. A few have romantic endings. One where you ended up with no one on a positive note. Another where you were so unlikeable in game that none of the mechs would date you.

There was a best friend, DLC, for all our non-romantic types.

The only thing I know about the plot was that you were a mechanic who helps to repair mechs and you take over your parents’ garage after they retire (or died, it was up in the air about it). I cannot remember what specific mechs were involved in the game but here are eight mechs that I think would be the best to use.

1. The Big Zam

Who does not love the Big Zam? I picture it would have himbo ken energy. A little stupid but well-meaning and polite.

2. Sazabi

Not going to lie, I feel like this would be the cold on the outside but warm on the inside dating sim character. It would have the Char ego and mommy issues but would work to resolve it.

3. RX-78

Traditional. Long walks on the beach. Romantic dinners. Prefers healthy communication and boundaries. Nothing but green flags for gramps.

4. Aerial

Cute, simplistic, and nice. Very much a walk in the wood’s kind of mech. It might take you out to pick fruit or something like that. Wholesome.

Would kill anyone for you though (but you would never find out).

5. Tequila Gundam

Frat boy turned into a polite individual. Probably used to party hard but now is keener on quiet nights. I would trust this mech to watch my drink, just saying.

6. Unicorn

A little overprotective but means well (a red flag but carry on). A little bland when it comes to dating but will try to do what makes you happy.

7. Z’gok

It may look like the Z’gok two braincells are fighting for third place but do not let the façade fool you. This mech is a smooth romancer. Poetry, homemade dinner, and everything you enjoy. Z’gok is there. Be prepared to be swooned on a Gomez Addams level.

8. Qubeley

Much like the Sazabi, the Qubeley appears to be cold on the outside but full of love on the inside. It may take some time for it to warm up to your advances but once invested it will open to you.

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Have a great Thursday!

-J